ME TIME shouldn’t be a struggle…
I love love love my baby girl. She is my biggest blessing from God. I love love love my husband. Sugar Plum Z stole his spot but he is definitely one of the best blessings granted to me. I love love love the newest bundle growing inside of me. I love love love Big Z! But what I don’t love is my lack of ME TIME. There I said it. Out Loud! Right here. I need some time alone.
Woosah! Even though I grew up in a big family. By family I mean siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles and then all the offspring. We all lived in close proximity in our early years and I currently live in close proximity to a bunch of them. But regardless, alone time was something I always craved, sought out and took even though some people thought I was being mean.
I had 2 roommates in college. I deliberately set my schedules opposite of theirs so I could be alone. And when I was given my own room later on, I was the happiest when I closed my door to the world! In adult life, I adopted a rule my mama had when we were growing up. No calls after 9pm. It better be a real emergency otherwise choice words were said.
Fast forward to wife life and motherhood in my late 30’s and the constant presence of people, choirs and obligations has me beat! I mean beat down! And the Internet… FORGET ABOUT IT! I’m lost in motherhood barely holding on to the person I was. The person the Hubs fell in love with. Yep I said that too. He can’t possibly truly enjoy this new me. Now we have another baby on the way and I won’t lie. I’m scared sh*tless.
So before the newest bundle of joy arrives, I’m making a conscious effort to carve out a teeny tiny bit of me time. The hubs works long hours so I get that he is exhausted and just wants to chill but I need him to chill with the busy bee that is Sugar Plum Z for a few hours a week. I’m working on getting her into a program two days a week for a few hours after that I’ll have to find some $$ to pay my niece to watch her. She’s studying early childhood education so this will be a win.
One way or another, I need a little me time. There are 168 hours in a week. I’m hoping for 12-16 hours of me time in a week if I can successfully work the above plan. That leaves up to 156 hours for everyone else plus little sleep.
What will I do with my 12-16 hours? Maybe nothing! But truthfully I will pray and meditate. Finish the children’s book I’m writing. Workout. invest time and skills into my blog. Launch one of the businesses I have been sitting on forever! Sip my coffee alone. Take a nap. Paint my nails. Take pictures. Read and be active in the book club I’m a member of. Or maybe I’ll do NOTHING! That last one deserved repeating. NOTHING is a viable option. That’s a lot to get done in a little time but even one task a week will mean a lot to me. Even one… Besides I know this little bit of time will help me be a better wife and mother.
FYI, I’m writing this at 5:08am. I’ve been up since 3! Pray for me.
Update: I wrote this post on 1/11 but never hit publish. Since then I had a mini meltdown but I also got some ME TIME! And I am feeling better already.Yippee!
KimJanuary 19, 2015 at 11:28 AM
Self-care is definitely needed especially when caring for others. I hope you enjoy every second of your me time.
KasiJanuary 19, 2015 at 2:25 PM
Everyone definitely needs some me time! I hope you’re able to carve it out a little more often. I guess I should enjoy all my me time while I’m single and living by myself while I can! 🙂
AdannaJanuary 20, 2015 at 12:39 AM
This is definitely a nonnegotiable, get your me time and enjoy the hell of it. If will make you. Better mom without doubt. Ill be cheering you on as you get to be more yourself and be the woman and mom you were created to be.
Christine St.VilJanuary 20, 2015 at 9:30 AM
Girl, you know I feel you on this one and you know how I feel about this subject. It sounds like you have a lot of family close by. Is that an option to drop Sugar Plum off even if it’s an hour or two once a week? We as moms need to make it our obligation to take time for ourselves because our families need us to, if they want us to be at our best. And YES! It is perfectly fine to do absolutely NOTHING when you do get a few minutes to yourself. So enjoy it because we’re always doing something! 🙂 XO
SonyaJanuary 20, 2015 at 1:17 PM
I’m like you I want more me time. I think it helps us to be better moms and wives when we have a little me time each day.
M JJanuary 23, 2015 at 9:36 PM
Yes I agree. The family can not be in a good place if mom is not in a good place.
Madison | Wetherills Say I DoJanuary 20, 2015 at 7:42 PM
I’m sure as a mom this is SO difficult! Really though, I think all of us need to be sure to carve out me time, it’s so important!
M JJanuary 23, 2015 at 9:35 PM
Thanks Madison. I am working on it. It is so important and is a non negotiable at this point.